Trump Sells New Wool Eye Mask
Allowing supporters to pull the wool over their own eyes for the next four years.
Good news for President Trump supporters: he’s selling a new thing!
President Trump has listed a new product for sale on the White House website: the Trump Wool Eye Mask.
The new wool eye mask allows supporters to pull the wool over their own eyes with ease, for a long night’s sleep.
The mask isn’t just for sleeping, however. There are an abundance of occasions to wear the Trump Wool Eye Mask:
Did Elon Musk just do a Nazi salute?
Nope! Just put on the Trump Wool Eye Mask and you’ll hear that he actually did a Roman salute. Simple mistake.
Did Donald Trump pardon people from jail who assaulted police?
No way! Just put on the Trump Wool Eye Mask and you’ll find that he actually freed January 6th hostages.
Did Donald Trump rescind the Executive Order that lowered prices on prescription drugs?
No, idiot. Put on the Trump Wool Eye Mask and you’ll realize that he did away with all of Biden’s dumb, anti-American policies.
The Trump Wool Eye Mask is on sale now for $100.47, or if you use the $TRUMP crypto coin, it’s only $99.47.