Talking Snowman Inspires New Religion
Magic in an old hat? More like the power of a divine being.
Humans are hardwired to search for meaning in this life and a group of children believe they’ve found just that in the form of a sentient snowman.
When a group of children placed a hat on snowman they built at recess, the snowman came to life.
While some of the children believe it was the hat that brought the snowman to life, the majority of the children believe the snowman to be a deity who came to life on his own.
“Where there was once balls of snow, there’s now an alive, likely omnipotent being,” said one of the children. “This isn’t the work of a ‘magic hat’ - this is the snowman. He is the magic.”
Those that believe the snowman is a deity have even started to write down his teachings in a book, going door to door and distributing the books to townsfolk.
There have even been troubling reports of the children saying they’d “go to the sky ” with the snowman.
However, detractors say the snowman is “dumb” and thus “nowhere near a deity.”
Said one skeptic, “That snowman is dumb as rocks. He brags about counting to five. I don’t know what the kids see in him, but he’s much closer to Frankenstein’s monster than Jesus.”
The snowman’s divine powers will be put to the test this weekend when the townsfolk force him into a sauna for 20 minutes.