Large Cocoon In Seattle Growing “Liberal Joe Rogan”
Democrats say “Liberal Joe Rogan” estimated to be ready by 2040
After a discouraging loss in the 2024 presidential election, Democrats learned they may not have as much influence with certain demographics as they would like.
Many news panelists began suggesting that Democrats need their own “liberal Joe Rogan” figure; an influential podcaster who hosts “free-thinking” guests for long form conversation.
Well, it appears Democrats took the advice and have begun the growing process!
A large cocoon was spotted in transit in Seattle, Washington on its way to an incubation lab where the cocoon will undergo metamorphosis until a “liberal Joe Rogan” emerges.
How long will this process take?
According to project leads, “liberal Joe Rogan” will emerge after only a few weeks, during which the cocoon will be injected with a steady stream of nootropic supplements.
Once “liberal Joe Rogan” emerges, he will be ready to walk right into the podcasting studio to start recording.
Unfortunately, it will take a while longer for “liberal Joe Rogan” to gain maximum influence. One project lead said:
Once the subject begins podcasting, they cannot immediately leap to the “propaganda” phase. That phase comes after years of building an audience in what we call the “harmless idiot” phase.
The lead went on to say it will take around 15 years for “liberal Joe Rogan” to have enough influence for a presidential election, meaning “liberal Joe Rogan” won’t be ready until the 2040 election.
So what do we do in the meantime?
Listen to “liberal Joe Rogan’s” podcast!
This strategy literally will not work unless he has an audience! So subscribe to his podcast!
But what if we don’t want to listen to the podcast? It sounds like he’s gonna ramble.
2040 democracy is counting on you to invest in this plan! You have to listen to “liberal Joe Rogan’s” podcast to give him a platform! Sure, he’ll ramble, but.. just, like, please don’t be difficult. This has to work.
Is his name actually going to be “liberal Joe Rogan?”
No. Whatever emerges out of that cocoon will immediately be submerged into a home grade cold plunge. When it comes up it will be asked, “What name does the water give you?”
The response will be its name.