Guy Too Cool For New Year’s Resolutions Quietly Begins Going to the Gym in Late December
“I actually started going to the gym last year.”
One local man who claimed New Year’s resolutions were “stupid as shit” has made the curious decision to start going to the gym again.
What’s interesting about the man’s change of habit is that it comes a week before the new year, technically allowing the man to say it’s not a New Year’s resolution. That small technicality will allow the man to say things like:
“Me? No, I actually started going to the gym last year.”
“New Year’s resolution? No, that’s buster shit. I’ve been going to the gym for a bit now.”
“I love the gym. Always have. My love for the gym predates 2025, so don’t even think about asking me if it’s a New Year’s resolution or I’ll go feral.”
When asked if he started the gym routine back up in late December to avoid calling it a resolution, the man said:
“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I don’t do resolutions.”
There are only a few more days in the year before the calendar flips to 2025, at which point millions will begin going to the gym again.
This man will not be one of them; he started going to the gym in 2024.